


It Means You're Alive

by Baymax_13



Series: A Firelord and a Gran Gran [3]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Apologies, Chronic Pain, Coming Out, Cooking, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Forgiveness, Hakoda is a father figure for Zuko, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, Kanna is a grandma figure for Zuko, Light Angst, M/M, Mentions of Therapy, Nothing other than canon though, Partially Blind Zuko (Avatar), Partially Deaf Zuko (Avatar), Past Child Abuse, Relationship Reveal, Sokka's leg, Sokka's whole family is just a family figure for Zuko, Sort Of, Southern Water Tribe, because they need it, sea prunes, the fire nation council SUCKS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:02:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27505006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baymax_13/pseuds/Baymax_13
Summary: “Come on love, talk to me,” Sokka said.Zuko looked down. “What if they don’t think I’m … good enough for you?”“Oh, love…” Sokka pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of Zuko’s head. “That’s not gonna happen. You already won over Gran Gran, and you know my dads love you.”“Yeah but... they love me as their son’s best friend, not as his boyfriend.” He sniffed. “I’ve hurt you before, how would they know I won’t do it again?”-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sokka and Zuko have decided to tell Hakoda and Bato about their relationship. Sokka’s nervous, sure, but Zuko is downright terrified, so he enlists Kanna's help, and learns a little bit about cooking and a lot about life in the process.Then things don't go quite right at dinner. Luckily, Dadkoda is there to help and Zuko begins to realize that maybe he can be loved after all (and that maybe he's been loved all along).
Relationships: Bato & Sokka (Avatar), Bato & Zuko (Avatar), Bato/Hakoda (Avatar), Hakoda & Kanna (Avatar), Hakoda & Sokka (Avatar), Hakoda & Zuko (Avatar), Kanna & Sokka (Avatar), Kanna & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: A Firelord and a Gran Gran [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1945933
Comments: 59
Kudos: 671





	It Means You're Alive

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!! I'm back!!
> 
> I am very very sorry this update took so long, but college has been absolutely kicking my butt and I finally got a small breather so I immediately sat down to write this. It's a bit of a longer work though, so hopefully that makes up for it. 
> 
> Also, there's more coming! I have a few more fics planned in this series so if you liked this I'd really love if you subscribed. People enjoying my work is really what keeps me motivated, and I appreciate every single one of you. 
> 
> This fic is a bit different from the rest in the series so far because it switches between POV's, but I really felt that was the best way to tell this story so I hope you like it. The future installments will probably follow this format too. 
> 
> Also, I based the part where Kanna teaches Zuko to cook on Latinx feelings towards food and how it relates to our culture and our family, and I've seen that this is also very true for a lot of indigenous peoples. I unfortunately couldn't find anything specific about this with regards to the Inuit people, so if anyone knows more than me please let me know in the comments. 
> 
> As always, this was written very late into the night, so if you spot any mistakes, definitely let me know in the comments.
> 
> Love you all! Stay safe :)))

_Zuko_

The waves were beating choppily against the hull of the ship, only adding to the things that were currently keeping Zuko from sleep. No one really knew this, (though he was sure Sokka suspected) but Zuko hated sleeping on the open water. It reminded him too much of those first weeks after he was banished, when the burn was still fresh and had to be debrided every night. 

The pain was bad, sure, but it was what he saw every time he closed his eyes that really made him want to stay awake. 

It was easier now, with Sokka’s warm body pressed against his, the gentle rhythm of his boyfriend’s breaths a tether against the evils in his mind. 

Except this time, the ocean felt like the least of his worries. They were going to visit the Southern Water Tribe for their annual diplomatic mission - which was actually just an official sounding excuse for Sokka to spend time with his family. He insisted that they were Zuko’s family too now, and sometimes he could even believe it, especially when Kanna fussed over him being “too skinny” and “too pale”. He had tried to explain to her that he was a pretty accurate representation of what the average fire nation citizen looked like (well, except for the glaring difference branded onto his face) but she just wasn’t having it. 

Usually, Zuko loved their visits to his boyfriend’s tribe. The first one had been a little rough, but after Kanna had forgiven him, (and he still wasn’t completely sure he deserved that) things had gotten better. And Bato and Hakoda had always welcomed him warmly. Really the only downside was the cold (since Zuko couldn’t exactly regulate his temperature for weeks on end) but he had started to get used to the temperature. And Sokka never let him stay out in the cold too long anyway; not since the whole hypothermia incident. 

So things were good, great even. But everything might be about to change, and Zuko wasn’t sure he could handle it. He didn’t really want to lose any more family, and he especially didn’t want Sokka to feel that abandonment. 

The warm weight pressed against him shifted, so that Sokka was now facing him, blue eyes bleary with sleep but alert nevertheless. 

“Did I wake you?” Zuko asked hesitantly. 

Sokka shook his head. “Nah, I had a weird dream.”

Zuko narrowed his eyes. “Nightmare?”

“Nope!” Sokka smiled. “I dreamt my beautiful, smart, kind, sexy, beautiful boyfriend wasn’t sleeping, because he was worrying about something he absolutely does not have to worry about.”

Rather than acknowledging the accusation, Zuko glared at Sokka good-naturedly. “You said beautiful twice.”

“That’s just how beautiful you are.”

Zuko scoffed, but was silenced by Sokka’s hand reaching up to trace gentle circles on his cheekbone. 

“Come on love, talk to me,” Sokka said. 

Zuko looked down. “What if they don’t think I’m … good enough for you?”

“Oh, love…” Sokka pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of Zuko’s head. “That’s not gonna happen. You already won over Gran Gran, and you know my dads love you.”

“Yeah but... they love me as their son’s best friend, not as his boyfriend.” He sniffed. “I’ve hurt you before, how would they know I won’t do it again?”

Sokka sat up, dragging Zuko up with him and into his arms. “Zuko, listen to me right now. Yes, you did bad things. But you were in a horrible situation, one that I’m not sure I would’ve acted any differently from you if I had been in your shoes. And more importantly, you changed. You realized that the path you were on wasn’t the right one, and you made the right choice. My dads know that. My Gran Gran knows that. And I know that. The only one who still has to get it through his thick skull is you.” 

He paused to take a breath. “You have every right to be nervous, but I know my dads will be happy for us. And if for some agni forsaken reason they’re not… well, then we go right back home. We might have to take Gran Gran to make sure she doesn’t kill them though.” A laugh. “My point is, I love you. Whatever happens on this trip won’t change that. And, if you don’t want to tell them, that’s ok too. I’m here baby, no matter what.”

Zuko felt the familiar pressure of tears building up behind his eyes at Sokka’s impassioned declaration. He would never understand how the spirits had decided to bless him with a man as amazing as Sokka, why they hadn’t punished him, made him atone for his actions. Sokka would probably say that he had suffered enough, but Zuko knew that no matter how much good he did, he would never deserve to be here, in this man’s arms. 

He wasn’t about to give it up though. 

“You’re right,” he said. “I guess I just… still feel weird around father figures.”

Sokka huffed a small laugh. “Yeah well if anyone has a right to that it’d be you.”

Zuko chuckled, snuggling deeper into Sokka’s chest. “Do you promise me that no matter what happens with your dads, we’ll be good?”

“I promise love.”

Zuko nodded. “Then I can do this.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Kanna_

Kanna was upset. Her grandson and her basically-grandson-in-law were arriving today, and she was stuck mending clothes for the village. Usually she wouldn’t have minded. It was an important job and she was happy to contribute in whatever way was necessary for the good of the community, but it was always one of her favorite times of the year when the familiar ship pulled up to port and Sokka and Zuko each greeted her in their own enthusiastic ways. For Sokka that usually meant spinning her around in a tight hug, while for Zuko it meant a stiff, formal bow until she opened her arms and he nestled himself into her shoulder. 

Even thinking about it brought a smile to her face, which was quickly replaced by a frown as she realized she’d accidentally made a knot in the coat she was mending.

It was still so crazy to think _fondly_ of the Fire Lord. The Fire Nation had been the main source of misery in her life since she was born, but Zuko had turned all of that around. He had turned his back on everything he knew and decided to help the world enter a new era of peace. 

Not to mention he was a _kid_. A very powerful kid, sure, but a kid nonetheless. He had just celebrated his eighteenth birthday a few months ago, and while the occasion had been joyful, it had made Kanna think about all that he’d been through in his short life. 

If it was up to her, _none_ of her kids would ever suffer like that again. 

Judging by the amount of light filtering in through the windows, the boys should have already arrived, though she still had a mountain of clothes to get through. She probably wouldn’t get to see them until dinner tonight. 

Just as she thought that, a knock sounded from outside her door. It couldn’t have been Hakoda or Sokka, since they would’ve simply barged in, and Pakku was at the Northern Water Tribe, so it was probably Bato. She stood up, cursing her aging joints, and went to greet her son-in-law. 

Except when she opened the door, it wasn’t Bato. It was a distinctly nervous looking Zuko.

“Zuko!” She smiled at him. “Come in, come in.”

He offered her a timid smile back as he stepped into the igloo, but he seemed as tense as he had been the first time he had visited, back when she was certain she would never forgive him. 

The spirits really did have a sense of humor. 

As predicted, he offered her a stiff fire-nation bow. And, as always, she opened her arms for him in response. He seemed relieved at the familiar motion, and some of the tension did melt from his frame as he allowed himself to sink into the hug. 

He stepped back soon though, anxious again. “I need your help with something.”

“Let’s sit down.” She led him over to the couch in front of the fireplace. Zuko lit the fire with a flick, allowing the room to be bathed in warmth. “What’s going on Zuko?”

Zuko bit his lip. “Sokka and I…” He inhaled sharply. “We’ve decided to tell chief Hakoda and Bato about our relationship.”

Kanna blinked. That wasn’t exactly what she’d been expecting, given Zuko’s current demeanor. Zuko looked frightened at the prospect of telling them, but Kanna couldn’t think of a reason why. Hakoda and Bato loved Zuko like he was their own, not to mention that they couldn’t exactly have a problem with them being two men without coming off as massive hypocrites. 

But clearly Zuko didn’t see it that way. He was hunched in on himself, as though trying to make himself less of a target, and Kanna knew enough about his history to guess at what he was thinking. 

“Of course Zuko, I’ll help in whatever way I can.”

He brightened. “Thank you. I- I had an idea…”

Kanna smiled in what she hoped was a comforting way, motioning to him to continue. 

Zuko shuffled. “I was wondering if you could teach me how to make some Southern Water Tribe food for tonight?”

Kanna smirked. This kid was smart. She knew there was no chance of this news not going down well, but if she hadn’t been sure, food would have been exactly the way to soften the blow. It was a lot harder to be angry after someone had made you a home cooked meal.

“I think that’s a lovely idea Zuko.” She stood, shuffling him out. “Meet me here about an hour before dinner time. Now go, spend time with Sokka!”

He laughed, looking as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, waving to her as he walked away from her igloo. 

Kanna closed the door behind him and looked scornfully at the pile of clothes still by her chair. “Damn chores. The village should throw me a parade.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Zuko_

Zuko arrived outside Kanna’s igloo exactly an hour before dinner. He was glad to have an ally in her amidst all the stress tonight was bringing him, but even this cooking lesson was giving him anxiety. 

He knew how important food was to Southern Water Tribe culture. Their recipes were one of the few things the Fire Nation hadn’t been able to take away from them, and they passed them down from generation to generation with reverence. Katara had made that _very_ clear when Toph had complained about her cooking one too many times. 

And Zuko had never really cooked before. He’d roasted meat over campfires when he was on the run, and he’d helped uncle with the tea shop, but that was the extent of his culinary experience. He didn’t want to mess it up. 

And what if he did mess it up, and then Hakoda and Bato realized that he couldn’t even give that small piece of home to Sokka? They definitely wouldn’t like him then. 

He knew he was spiraling, but once he got going, it was hard to make it stop. All the insecurities that lived just barely below the surface threatened to overwhelm him. 

Him and Sokka had both been going to therapy recently, trying to deal with the remnants of the war and, well, everything else as best they could. It wasn’t exactly what Zuko would describe as a pleasant experience, but definitely a necessary one. One of the things that his therapist had said that really stuck with him was that he was allowed to think the negative thoughts, he just wasn’t allowed to give them power. 

Of course, that was easier said than done, but the first step was thinking through what exactly the consequences of his worries would be. He knew he wouldn’t lose Sokka (no matter what his deep rooted trust issues tried to tell him), he knew he wouldn’t lose Gran Gran, and he knew he wouldn’t lose Uncle. He was fairly certain he wouldn’t lose Bato or Hakoda either, but that was the main source of his anxiety, so he steered away from that topic. 

He could survive the worst case scenario. It wouldn’t be pretty, not by any stretch of the imagination, but he could survive it. He had clawed his way out of darker places, kept going with a lot more pain and a lot less support. He could do this, no matter what the outcome ended up being.

He knocked on the door. 

Almost immediately, it flew open, Kanna’s short figure greeting him with a warm smile. “Zuko, come in, come in.”

Zuko stepped into the igloo, shedding his thick parka and hanging it up on the hooks near the door. The igloo was small, so Zuko could see the kitchen from the doorway, already set up with everything they would need for cooking. 

“What are we making?” Zuko asked hesitantly. 

Kanna smiled. “Stewed Sea prunes. They’re Sokka -”

“- and Hakoda’s favorite.” Zuko finished with a laugh. “I’m well aware.”

Kanna chuckled. “Yes, it’s hard to miss with those two.”

Zuko stepped up to the ingredients, eyeing them with trepidation. “So um… what should I do?”

“Well first we need to chop the sea prunes up, make sure they’re small enough to get soft in the water. The knife is there by the cutting board.”

Zuko nodded, rolling up his sleeves and inspecting the sharp blade. He was pretty sure it was carved out of bone, though which animal, he couldn’t have said. “How small?”

Kanna shrugged. “Into about quarters. It’s not really a science, we just kind of go by heart.”

Zuko groused, and Kanna shot him back an amused smirk. 

They sat in silence for a while, the only sound being the dragging of their knives against wood. 

“So…” Kanna started mischievously. “How are you and Sokka?”

Zuko flushed, a scowl threatening to take over his features. “Good,” he said curtly. 

Kanna glanced at him. “You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to Zuko. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

She looked so genuine too, Zuko immediately deflated. “I’m sorry, it’s not you, it’s just… we’ve been getting a lot of push back from the council recently. It’s got me kind of on edge.”

Kanna hummed, a strange look just shy of pity on her face. “Yes, I can imagine it’s hard, what with Sozin’s law being so recently repealed.” She resumed chopping. “You know, Bato and Hakoda went through something really similar when they announced their relationship. Usually, in Water Tribe culture, you wouldn’t even really tell anyone except your immediate family, but since Koda’s the chief…”

Zuko sighed. “I just don’t know why it has to be so hard.”

Kanna shook her head. “I wish I had a good answer for you Zuko.”

“I love Sokka so much, I want to just be able to hold his hand when we’re out. I want to be able to kiss him after council meetings and during ceremonies. I want to… I want to marry him someday, Kanna.”

Kanna smiled. “And you will Zuko. You’re the firelord! The council may be annoying, and bigoted, but at the end of the day you make the decisions, and if Sokka makes you happy, then you deserve to be happy.”

“I know you’re right,” said Zuko. “But, I just don’t want to disappoint my people. I don’t want them to think I’m putting my own happiness before theirs.”

Kanna stopped chopping, wiping her hands on a rag before coming up to Zuko. She reached up to gently hold his face in her wrinkled hands, the right one resting just below the edge of his scar. “Zuko, listen to me. I’m old. I’m really old. And if I can tell you one thing that I’ve learned, it’s that love is worth fighting for. And I know you, your soul. You’re a good person, and you’ll never let your people suffer. But you deserve to be selfish too. You deserve to be _happy_ , Zuko.”

Zuko took in a sharp breath. It was exactly what he needed to hear. “Thank you, Kanna.”

Kanna scoffed, though the beginning of a fond smile was already blooming on her face. “How many times do I have to tell you to call me Gran Gran?”

Zuko just laughed. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Sokka_

Ok, so Sokka was nervous. So what? It was perfectly natural to be nervous with what he and Zuko were about to do. But if there was one thing Sokka knew, it was logic. And logic dictated that tonight was going to go great (though he would settle for it going well). 

First off, there was no reason for his dads, as in two of them, both male, very much married to each other, to be upset he was with a boy. None whatsoever. Not to mention, dad already knew he was bi. Or, at least, that’s how he had interpreted Gran Gran’s comment about their “similarities”. He wasn’t wrong of course, Sokka was bi, very _(very)_ much bi.

Secondly, his dads _loved_ Zuko. Every time they saw him Sokka thought he would have to physically restrain them from adopting him, that’s how much they loved him (and stop them he shall, because he was already _dating_ Zuko, and he had gotten to him first, thank you very much.)

Thirdly, Gran Gran would be there, and she already knew about the two of them. She probably knew more about their relationship than anyone else if he was being honest. And she wouldn’t let things go wrong tonight, she just wouldn’t. She was already fiercely protective of Sokka, but ever since that first visit, she had taken Zuko under her wing too. 

Agni, what was it about his boyfriend that made everyone so _oogie_?

Regardless, tonight was empirically going to be _fine_. 

And yet, he was nervous. 

Though, if Sokka was nervous, Zuko looked downright terrified. He had come into the dining room at some point during Sokka’s inner monologue, and had settled to his right. They were early; Bato and Hakoda wouldn’t be arriving yet for another few minutes, but Sokka much preferred being early to being late, and though Zuko usually made fun of him for it, tonight he just seemed grateful he wasn’t the first in the room. 

“Hey,” Sokka questioned. “Are you ok?”

Zuko huffed a small laugh. “I’m better now. Gran Gran helped.”

Sokka was glad to hear that, of course. But looking at Zuko, paler than usual and rapidly clenching and unclenching his hands, he almost didn’t want to imagine what pre- “better” looked like. 

Sokka offered Zuko his own hand. His boyfriend glanced at it for a second, then took it gratefully and continued squeezing. 

“It’ll be fine love,” Sokka said. 

“I know.”

The door suddenly burst open, and Sokka deftly removed his hand from Zuko’s with the practiced ease of someone used to sneaking around. 

He was going to be so glad to not have to do that anymore, at least not around his dads. The stupid council he could deal with, but not being able to share this part of his life with the people he loved had been taking more of a toll on him than he would care to admit. 

Gran Gran bustled in, followed by Hakoda carrying a large pot that smelled _divine_ , and Bato carrying a few sets of plates and cutlery. 

“Kids!” Hakoda exclaimed. “It’s so good to see you!”

Sokka and Zuko both stood, though Sokka alone moved towards where his dad had set the large pot down, allowing himself to be pulled into a hug by the only slightly taller man. Bato hugged him next, ruffling his wolf tail affectionately. Sokka looked back to where Zuko was standing by his chair, his smile falling a bit at his boyfriend’s obvious apprehension. He decided not to call attention to it and instead began setting the table. 

Once everyone was seated, and Gran Gran had scooped some stewed sea prunes into everyone’s bowl, she called everyone’s attention. “Before we begin eating, I think everyone should thank Zuko for the meal he so graciously made.”

Sokka stared at Zuko’s rapidly reddening face in awe. “You made this?”

Zuko nodded. 

Sokka laughed, a little breathless. “You’re amazing, you know that?” he whispered. 

“I’m learning.”

They both shared a quick smile, before their attention was diverted to Hakoda and Bato thanking Zuko with kind looks on their faces. 

They all stuffed themselves with sea prunes, and Sokka wouldn’t have even had to lie if Zuko had asked how they were. They were spectacular, tasting like home but with an extra fire nation kick that warmed him from the inside out. 

He gazed at Zuko, looking radiant, his golden eyes following the discussion among the table members. Maybe the fire nation kick tasted like home too. 

The meal was rapidly drawing to a close, with most of the bowls cleared and Hakoda leaning back in his chair, a hand resting on his abdomen. If they were going to make the announcement, they should probably do it soon before his dads went to sleep off their food coma. 

Zuko seemed to have come to the same conclusion, because his hands started trembling ever so slightly. Sokka reached for one almost on instinct, squeezing and hoping the familiar motion would ground Zuko. 

It seemed to work too because Zuko just closed his eyes, took a deep breath and said, “before we end the night, I actually wanted to make an announcement.”

Sokka looked around at his family. Kanna was staring at Zuko, a fond and proud look on her face. Hakoda and Bato had both straightened up, and Bato was leaning forward in his chair, letting Zuko know he was listening. 

Zuko squeezed his hand, so tight it almost hurt, but Sokka didn’t complain. Zuko was doing the heavy lifting right now, and he could do this for him. He could be there for him. 

“Sokka and I are… together.” He paused, waiting, braced for something, and though Sokka didn’t know what, he could posit a guess. Guessing with Zuko was always such a sad game. 

When a second passed and no one had said anything, Zuko continued. “As in… we’re boyfriends?” His voice went up at the end, phrasing it as a question. 

Bato and Hakoda looked at each other, then Hakoda cleared his throat. “Um… we kind of… knew?”

Zuko gaped beside him, but it was Sokka who spoke. “Wait _what_?” he sputtered. “You knew and didn’t tell us?”

Bato, at least, had the good grace to look sheepish, but his dad just looked at him the same way he had when he had tried to use one fish hook to get another one out, as though he had done something dense on purpose. “Sokka you stay in the same igloo when you come visit, and only one bed is ever slept in.”

Sokka’s dark skin flushed. “Well yeah but -”

Hakoda continued, “You look at each other like love sick polar bear puppies.”

“I mean how much can you really tell from a look -”

“Whenever one of you is hurt or in pain the other practically goes crazy.”

“That’s part of any healthy friendsh-”

“You’re holding hands right now!” Hakoda cried. 

Sokka looked down at his hand, that was, in fact, currently holding Zuko’s. 

“I… have no response to that one,” he finally said. 

His dad smiled, seemingly satisfied with having won that argument. 

Bato cleared his throat. “We’re very happy for both of you, by the way, and fully supportive.”

Hakoda blinked, seeming to realize that he had missed a crucial step in the parenting guide to your kid sort of coming out to you. “Oh! Yes, we’re thrilled for you, and we love you very much.”

Bato snorted. 

At that moment, Zuko seemed to unfreeze. “I’m sorry, that’s it? You _knew_? I’ve been working myself into a frenzy for weeks dreading telling you, worried I’d cost Sokka his _father_ , and you _knew_?”

Zuko stood up, fists clenched and jaw tight. “I need a minute.” He turned to Sokka. “Don’t follow me.”

And then he walked right out the door, slamming it shut behind him. 

After a tense second, Gran Gran stood. “Well I think that went splendidly!” She started gathering the dirty dishes, and then stopped abruptly, staring at Hakoda. “Well? What are you waiting for? Go after him!”

Hakoda gaped. “He said not to follow him.”

Kanna sighed, “He told _Sokka_ not to follow him; he never said anything about you.”

His dad seemed to process her words, and then his face took on a sad look. “You’re right mom, I’m sorry. I’ll go find him.” He stood, grabbing his parka on the way out, and Zuko’s too just in case. Sokka was grateful. Zuko would be fine with his bending for a while, but it was hard to maintain any semblance of heat for long in the south pole. 

Sokka watched his dad go, and then let out a groan, dropping his head to the table. 

This hadn’t been on his list of things that could go wrong. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Zuko_

Zuko ran out of the house so fast he forgot to grab his parka, a fact he was very much regretting right about now. He had settled into a spot Sokka had shown him during their first visit, an outcropping of rock just on the outskirts of the village. It was still freezing, but at least the rock provided some shelter against the wind. 

The parka wasn’t his only regret. He hated when his temper got the better of him like that; it made him think too much of when he had been an angry 16 year old chasing after the avatar in some desperate mission to go home. 

It made him think too much of when he had hurt his friends... hurt Sokka. 

Zuko sighed, dropping his head to rest between his knees. He would go back to apologize soon, he just needed to calm down first. He didn’t even really know why he was so angry. By all accounts it had gone much better than he had expected. Hakoda and Bato had been supportive, even happy for them. Hakoda had even said that he- that he loved them. 

A warm, furry thing was gently draped onto his back, and Zuko almost jumped out of his skin, whirling around to face his attacker. 

Except it wasn’t an attacker. It was Hakoda, hands up in surrender and a guilty expression on his face. “I’m sorry Zuko, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Zuko stepped out of his stance, embarrassed. “No, it’s ok.”

He pulled the parka back around his shoulders and sat back down, Hakoda settling in next to him on his blind side. He turned to face him. He doubted the man knew about his disability on his left, and this didn’t seem the time to bring it up either. 

“Zuko…” Hakoda started. “I wanted to apologize for earlier.”

Zuko moved to interrupt him, but Hakoda gave a minute shake of his head. “No please, let me.”

Zuko acquiesced, leaning back. 

“Bato and I should’ve asked you when we suspected, and we should have given it the weight it deserved when you decided to tell us. I could tell you were nervous throughout dinner, but I didn’t think.” He chuckled. “Bato says I never think. But my point is, it was clearly a very big deal to you, and I turned it into a competition with my son. I’m sorry.”

Zuko closed his eyes for a second, absorbing all of that. It was still so foreign to him, that this man, this _father_ , could just apologize like that. Could admit he’d been wrong. That Zuko could sit through this conversation and not expect punishment at the end. 

“I forgive you, but... it’s not all on you.” He scratched his scar nervously. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that. It was honestly a much better reaction than the one I had been scared to get. I just… got jealous? I guess?”

Hakoda hummed. “Jealous?”

“That it could just… not be a big deal. I’ve known I was gay since I was eleven or twelve, but I’ve known since I can remember that it was a crime punishable by death. I’ve known since forever that I can’t look at boys the way I look at girls.” He paused. “I’ve known since forever that whatever love my family gave me was entirely conditional.”

“Zuko…”

“I mean, I realize now it wasn’t really love. I know that. But… it’s still there, that want. And I was so scared… because Sokka _has_ love. Everyone can see how loved he is, and I didn’t want him to have to go through that, that realization that that love is contingent on _something_.” Zuko felt a stray tear make its way down his face. “Because it sucks, and it hurts, and I never want Sokka to feel that pain.”

“Zuko… can I hug you?”

Zuko gave a sharp nod before he found himself engulfed in Hakoda’s thick parka and strong arms. He tried desperately to hold it in but he couldn’t help letting out a sob at the comforting pressure. The arms around him tightened at the sound, and finally, Zuko let it all out, his hiccupping whimpers echoing in the small space. 

“Zuko I want you to know something. Whatever happened in the past, you are loved now. It’s clear how much Sokka loves you. How much Katara, Toph, Aang, Suki, Mai, and Ty Lee love you. How much Gran Gran and Bato love you. And I hope you believe me when I say that I love you. Sokka is loved, yes, but if anyone was looking, they would see just how loved you are too. 

Zuko’s could only sob harder in response.

Hakoda’s hand trailed up to cup the back of his head, pressing him more firmly into his hold. “It’s alright Zuko, it’s ok. Just let it out. You’re safe. I’m here.”

Hakoda kept murmuring consolations until Zuko cried himself out, and didn’t let go until the firebender himself stepped back. He frantically wiped at his teary face, trying to compose himself. 

Hakoda stood, shaking off the dirt from the ground and offered Zuko a hand. Zuko took it, but didn’t look Hakoda in the eyes. 

“It’s alright to cry Zuko,” Hakoda said in the most gentle voice Zuko had ever heard him use. “It means you’re alive.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Sokka_

Sokka was pacing, which really wasn’t his brightest idea, given the fact that he could already feel the familiar pain beginning to make its way up his leg. It seemed like a reasonable reaction though, seeing as how it had been over an hour since his very upset boyfriend had slammed the door and left.

“Sokka, you should sit down,” Gran Gran said. 

“Can’t.”

Gran Gran sighed, standing up and coming over to him. She grabbed his arm and led him to the larger sofa in the sitting area, pushing him down. “Leg up,” she instructed. 

Sokka grumbled, but obeyed, and only stopped the sigh of relief out of sheer willpower. 

Gran Gran gave him a knowing look anyway. 

Just then however, the door opened and Sokka shot up, ignoring the pain and heading straight for his stupid jerkbending boyfriend. He threw himself at Zuko, arms encircling his neck. He felt Zuko reciprocate the motion, and all the tension he had been holding since dinner drained out of him. 

He pulled back, grasping onto Zuko’s face desperately to look at him. He seemed alright, less upset than before, but his eyes were distinctly red rimmed, and Sokka could see the light, accidental scratch marks around the edges of the scar that he knew Zuko only gave himself when he was particularly worked up. 

“I’m alright Sokka,” Zuko said. 

“Good, I was worried. You left without your parka.”

Zuko chuckled. “You know I’m a firebender, right?”

Sokka scowled. “That didn’t exactly help you when you fell into the ocean on that fishing trip.”

“Agni, will you ever stop bringing that up?”

Sokka leaned in closer to Zuko’s face, foreheads pressed against each other and noses brushing. “I’ll stop bringing it up when you stop getting into precarious situations involving the cold, deal?”

Zuko nodded, closing his eyes. “Deal.”

Sokka leaned in the last measure, closing his own eyes as his lips collided with Zuko’s. He still tasted like stewed sea prunes, but more importantly he _felt_ like Zuko. His Zuko. 

Zuko was the one to pull back. “I guess we can do that here now…”

Sokka laughed, high and clear. “I guess so.”

He stepped back, immediately wincing as his bad leg took his weight. Zuko noticed, because of course he did. Zuko always noticed when he was in pain. 

He gave him a concerned look, reaching to support his weight. “Your leg?”

Sokka nodded, though he also rolled his eyes. “It’s not that bad.”

Zuko gave him a look. 

Hakoda chuckled from the other side of the room, and the couple turned to look at him. “Sorry, it’s just that… you’re good for each other,” he said. 

Zuko blushed, and Sokka grinned at the simple declaration. 

“Come on, let’s get you sitting down,” Zuko said as he helped Sokka over to the couch again. They both sat, Zuko by Sokka’s feet, and Sokka let out a sigh of relief as his boyfriend pulled his bad leg into his lap and started to rub his warmed-up hands over it. 

“I’ll go get some hot towels,” Gran Gran said, ambling towards the stovetop. 

Sokka looked around the room, at Zuko, at his dads, at his Gran Gran, and he felt loved. He felt so loved. 

And he could tell from the gentle smile on his face and the look in his eyes, that Zuko felt loved too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> If you've been thinking of what to get me for the holidays, a kudos or especially a comment would make me very happy :))


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